New Beginnings
by redbird-flying-away
Summary: She decides to run away with him after all.


New Beginnings 12/23/09

She's breathing, so deep and fast that it's verging on a panic attack. The summer air drifts through her open window, stagnant in its heat. The sweat droplets pool at the back of her neck and down between her breasts, and this damned maddening heat is slowing her thinking process.

_"Don't say no to make me go away. Only say no if you really mean it."_

A tear drips down her cheek, and it takes a moment for her to realize it's not sweat. 'Oh God, why did I say no!?' With speed she did not know she possessed, she throws open her dorm door and runs downs the hall, an otherworldly sense guiding her towards him. She's out of the building and running towards the parking lot, and it doesn't matter that her bare feet cry in protest at the harsh pavement, because she can see his beat up car and it's a beacon of light to her; everything she now realizes she wants desperately. She remarks inside her head how cliché it is that he's leaning against his car smoking a cigarette, the collar of his leather jacket popped up around his neck. His eyes meet hers and he drops them quickly, takes a long drag on his cigarette and focuses on her toenails, bright glittery purple her mother painted on when they were bored. She's frustrated at his deterrence, and she thinks, 'Good lord isn't he sweltering in that jacket?' What she hasn't realized is that the rise in heat she felt back at the dorm was all her reaction to him; it's otherwise a very mild summer night out.

He's finished the cigarette and flicks it on to the ground, and their silent game is over. They must speak now, and it's here that they always do the most damage to one another. He takes his gaze away from her toes and looks back into her blue eyes. So serious is his look, she believes he can see right into her soul; but if that were true, they never would have got into this situation.

"You said no." She feels her heart clench as he clears his voice, obviously embarrassed at the child-like tone of his voice.

"I meant yes." She pauses, hoping her voice was not as unsteady as it felt. When she looks at his shocked face, she feels everything let go and she smiles. He nods, and approaches her as if a man on a mission, which he is, she realizes, but then her brain turns fuzzy again as she heats up once more, tingles starting from her purple-painted toenails, scorching her stomach and twisting at her lungs and heart. His soft warms lips capture hers, and gently he places his left hand on the back of her head and takes her right hand in his own, lacing their fingers.

They break apart, large genuine smiles on their faces, and he tugs her hand, leading her toward the dorm.

"Let's go get your stuff, and some shoes." He says this last part gazing fondly at her bare feet, the look in his eyes almost scolding. She laughs, and she would skip right now if she wasn't holding his hand and if she was five years old. His right hand is warm and comforting in her own, a weight that is familiar and has been much missed. He rubs circles on her hand with his thumb, completely distracting her as they walk and suddenly, he's led her to her dorm. The door creaks on its hinge, as if to tell her its anger at being thrown open so carelessly and left to hang. She surveys the packed boxes and takes a rather small one, throwing in books from other boxes, CDs, some clothing, and her toiletries. Together they haul her few remaining boxes out into the hall, and she fleetingly is thankful her mother and her exchanged boxes sooner, but she crushes that thought quickly. This is a subject she doesn't want to discuss first with her mother, and though her mother finds it frustrating and unlike her, she's realized she's never truly needed guidance with him. She follows her heart. They drag the heavy boxes with most of her freshman year packed in them to her Prius, lining them up neatly in her trunk. They walk a final time to the dorm, and she locks the door with her key. He hoists her last remaining box onto his shoulder and grabs her hand with his free one, and as they walk out of the dorm to his car, it is not a walk of shame, but a walk of new beginnings.

Once they have reached his car and she's put her box in the back seat and buckled, she takes off the shoes she quickly put on and laughs to herself. They are the still shiny saddle shoes she wore every single day in high school; how fitting is it that these shoes which she began their journey with, will continue on with them. He lights a cigarette, and she fondly caresses a well-worn copy of _On the Road_ that sits on his dashboard and she asks him, "Where will we go?"

He grins at her, starts up the engine, and says, "Wherever the road will take us."

That's good enough for her.


End file.
